View Full Version : Take the scrub test

lawrence stone
06-23-2000, 09:12 AM
<br> Your all fimiliar with the TLC song “No Scrubs” right? <p>According to the song a “Scrub” is a boy who for various <br>reasons will make an undersirable boyfriend. <p>Are you a lawn care SCRUB? <p>If you can answer yes to many of the following questions <br>YOU are considered a lawn care SCRUB. <p>1. You have never used a stick edger. <br>2. You live in “fly over” country. <br>3. You took a “short bus” when you went to high school at age 21 <br>4. You actively solicit quarter acre and less commercial sites. <br>5. You have a Toro hydro walk behind that has 100 hours on the <br>clock that you can’t get to go straight for you have no clue as how to adjust the controls thus effectively having a $4500 paperweight. <br>6. You have to drive 200 miles to buy power equipment because you owe every dealer in town money. <br>7. You have no clue as figure out “gross profit margin”. <br>8. Before you got into the lawn care biz you ‘serviced’ portable toilets or worked at a spice factory.. <br>9. You’re unable to pass the pesticide licensing exams (see “short bus” above). <br>10. You think a five acre apartment complex is a “big” job and decline to bid on the project. <br>11. You live in the capitol of your state and ask the question: Where does one find state contracts? <br>12. You surround yourself with like weak minded individuals. <br>13. You close on 90% of your initial low end residential contacts thus effectively working for nothing and screwing up your local market for the licensed contractors who actually know their costs and profit margins. <br>14a. You have to buy new mowers for you are so poor (see #13) <br>the only tools you have are a bent flat screwdriver and a claw hammer you found in a customer’s turf. <br>14. You clean up dog **** at “no cost”. <br>15. You advertise your services in the penny saver and offer <br>a “senior citizens” discount. <br>16. You listen to the Jerry Baker radio show and swear by <br>his “tonics”. <br>17. You get all your fertilizer at K-Mart cuz it’s cheaper there. <br>18. Your helper, computer mentor, and financial advisor is <br>still in junior high school. <br>19. You have no real interpersonal relationships just “internet” friends. <br>20. Your pickup truck has a flathead engine. <p> <p><p><font size="1">Edited by: lawrence stone

06-23-2000, 10:15 AM
Hilarious!<p>...and strangely familiar...<p>;)<p>-TGC

06-23-2000, 11:11 AM
darn you stone!<p>I think your standards are too high!<p>I think a couple of yes answers should be allowed! how will the rest of us ever earn the self respect that we so badly need under such an unforgiving test of scrub worthiness?<p>always the downtroden,<p>GEO

06-23-2000, 11:44 AM
Hers a couple more....<br>You sharpen your blades every two months whether they need it or not<br>You cant figure out why the string on your string trimmer wont hold up(it works great on your kite!)<br>You consider mowing ANY lawn for less than 25.00 a week.<br>You once tried mixing wesson with your gas(its oil, isnt it?)

06-23-2000, 12:16 PM
i don't necesarily associate scrubs with belt drives (i have one myself), but anytime i see a hydro WB on a trailer, i think that guy is profesional and smart. I can't see how these big companies continue to buy belt-drives.

06-23-2000, 02:17 PM
I wonder if John ever straightened out the problem with his Toro, or did he just use it to prop up old shutters in the back of the garage?<p>Bill

bill phagan
06-23-2000, 04:04 PM
Here are a couple of more injections of humor........................................* Your best company vehicle wins the &quot;ugly truck&quot; contest.<br>* You have 5 trailer lights and none of them work.<br>* Your hedgetrimmers have no blades.<br>* Your weedeater doubles as your fishing pole.<br>* Your proposals are written on fast food napkins.<br>* Your equipment security is a pit bull dog.<br>* You remove dog feces for free OR for a fee.<br>* You think dining at Taco Bell is a gourmet experience.<p>

06-23-2000, 04:25 PM
you bend 50 blades a season, but its okay cause you can heat em up and &quot;fix em&quot;<p><br>You blame yourself not being able to handle a &quot;big&quot; lawn mower on Lesco!<br><p>----------<br>&lt;a href=&quot;http://communities.msn.com/guidosequipmentpics/&quot;&gt;&quot;Guido&quot;&lt;/a&gt;<br>David M. Famiglietti

06-23-2000, 06:30 PM
D*@# guido, that is ruthless!! (Funny as hell, but ruthless) I hope lawnranger sees this.<br>

06-23-2000, 06:30 PM
D*@# guido, that is ruthless!! (Funny as hell, but ruthless) I hope lawnranger sees this.<p><p><font size="1">Edited by: lakegastonla

06-23-2000, 07:25 PM
Wonder if Retro saw this?<p>Scrub- Uses their string trimmer to trim shrubs.

06-23-2000, 07:47 PM
We got a scrub advertising yards &quot;20$ and up&quot;. He has been in business about 4 years now.

Eric ELM
06-23-2000, 07:54 PM
We had a customer that sold his house to some cheap skates that found some scrubs to mow their lawn this season. They haven't sharpened their blades yet this season. The ends of the blades of grass are so split and brown, that the lawn looks dead and it's not from lack of rain. We do the lawn next to it and you can see the exact lot line, plush green to dead brown. I can't believe these guys stay in business. This is one good example of my saying after my signiture. :)<p>----------<br>&lt;a href=&quot;http://pages.prodigy.net/eric.erickson/&quot;&gt;Eric@ELM&lt;/a&gt;<br>The Grass is always Greener on the other side of my competitors fence

06-23-2000, 08:33 PM
Why not educate rather than humiliate. I really don't see the point on wasting time telling some people how bad there small business is (except for the humor side of it) but some may not find humor at all in it. This site has helped many people understand the green industry which in turn helps us all. I just feel that some posts here have been more to humilate or brag rather than educate. I like to help as much as I can on here and out on the field with competitors..it has helped our market from low-ballers.....just my opinion.<br><p><font size="1">Edited by: LoneStarLawn

06-23-2000, 08:47 PM
Lonestar you got it all wrong. I dont think there is a scrub who is a member of this forum. Scrubs cant operate a computer. So as long as nobody talking to you poleees quit cryin

06-23-2000, 09:17 PM
Guido,<p>I dont bend 60 blades a season and i dont hea t them up that was just a question. I dont appreciate you laughing at my question no matter how stupid its just a question. If i knew you it would be ok but i dont know you so i take it personally. Sorry.<p>bdemir

06-23-2000, 09:22 PM
Certainely should be something there about not paying taxes ( income, personal, business). Hiring labor under the table.

06-23-2000, 09:39 PM
Charles I think you just proved my point.....

06-23-2000, 09:59 PM
Well, I'll tell ya, it'd be real easy for me to take offense to some of the comments but I just take 'em with a grain of salt. I'll learn from some of the things I read, laugh with some, laugh *at* some, and carry on. <p>And I'll still cut some lawns for less than $25/cut. Haven't heard a reasonable argument not to, yet, particularly if the darn thing takes me ten minutes to stop, unload, cut and load. Customer is happy. Tommy is happy. Bills are paid. What's the big deal? ;)<p>-TGC

06-23-2000, 10:02 PM
ok, I take it back. Maybe there are scrubs that can operate a computer

06-23-2000, 10:20 PM
Hello Everybody:<p>Anybody can operate a computer, but it's what you do with it that makes the difference.<p>If ya want to help people, well do it?<p><p>----------<br>GrassMaster - Home: www.lawnservicing.com<br>My Start Up Page www.lawnservicing.com/startup/

06-23-2000, 11:39 PM
Right on TGC,we all need a laugh evry once in a while.The comment about the $25 cut,IMHO,gets to the heart of the scrub debate.Truth be told,I cut a lawn for $23 per week.Its about 1m and happens to be in the midst of a group of ten that i have.What I will never do anywhere but here is admit that.Because then every weenie with a dinky lawn expects the same.By my own defenition,there is a scrub who refers some people to me(he has all the work he can handle by virtue of low prices).He first tells them what he would charge and if i want the job i have to give them the hard sell and long explanations.Ijust get tired of it .If i want to make money i apparently have to charge more than you.On one hand,good for you. On the other,WHY IN THE WORLD DO YOU NOT WANT TO MAKE MORE.If the market will bear it,RAISE YOUR PRICE! I know the market will bear it because I CHAGE M0RE THAN YOU.So please,all scrubs,make more money and make my life a little easier and Raise your price.

06-24-2000, 12:21 AM
You might be a scrub if .... you keep an extension cord on your trailor.<p>

06-24-2000, 03:21 AM
Guido,<br>Your on fire...but, I must ask...how many properties did you maintain this week?

06-24-2000, 04:08 AM
toroguy, thanks I think?? Read my profile and you'll get a good idea, but here a quick one for you. Used too be in lawncare, not licensed, but I paid my taxes, had insurance, etc. Made a killing 100 lawns mixed 70% residential, 30% commercial, all $30 or over, and that was over 2 years ago. I'm in the Air Force now fulll time. I'm a pavements specialist and heavy equipment operator. I know it doesn't sound like much, just trveling around the world, building, inspecting, and repairing the runways that get our great planes in the air to win us some wars!!!! When I am at my home base (Germany right now) I also am the military memeber in charge of our grounds maintenance shop. We do all the base maintenance and construction. The only thing I don'tmee with is the applicating side ( we hve a seperate antomology shop/career field) and irrigation systemds (the plumbing shop takes care of that, we just trench for them). I'm having a tremendously succesful Air Force career so far and plan on continuing it for another 18 years. When I retire from the Air Force, I plan on starting up full time in grounds maintenance. I work on a &quot;dream&quot; business plan during my free time, that I don't spend on here. I hope those are good enough credentials!! And everyone have a happy 4th!! Its not just about the fireworks though!<p>----------<br>&lt;a href=&quot;http://communities.msn.com/guidosequipmentpics/&quot;&gt;&quot;Guido&quot;&lt;/a&gt;<br>David M. Famiglietti

06-24-2000, 07:32 AM
Do they bend blades in the air force, LOL just kidding.

06-24-2000, 08:30 AM
They just buy 500$ hammers Bedmir, lol

06-24-2000, 08:37 AM
If they bend a blade, they buy a new mower! No tune-ups either, just new engines! If the AF were a business they'd be going bankrupt a ong time ago!<p>----------<br>&lt;a href=&quot;http://communities.msn.com/guidosequipmentpics/&quot;&gt;&quot;Guido&quot;&lt;/a&gt;<br>David M. Famiglietti

bill phagan
06-24-2000, 08:57 AM
I think the above comments are actually more positive than negative.......and the levity is most important. When I had my 40 man operation, I would've welcomed any and all humor just to get me thru the summer months...equipment in ponds, employees not showing up, poor quality work and sending them back, theft, damages, administrivia, employee disappointments and all the rest. I concur completely with being positive, educating and not disparaging. Also a good way to get stuff off your chest. Just need to &quot;vent&quot; sometimes. And really, we are laughing at ourselves and that's good.<br>

06-24-2000, 10:13 AM
The value of your truck doubles with a full<br>tank of fuel. :)<p>Karl<br>

06-24-2000, 11:42 AM
Crew,<p>Thanks for the insightful response. I never thought I'd get one in the midst of the wisecracks and one-liners. ;)<p>Let me make this one thing perfectly clear, however, I *do* charge more than $25/cut on most yards. Most of my yards are big enough that I make my money on them by charging large amounts of money. :)<p>What I don't get, and I'm dying to have explained to me in reasonable fashion, is how I'm losing money or hurting the Industry by charging $25/month on a lawn that takes maybe a half-hour all month to do? My math tells me that adds up to $50/hour with very low expense. <p>I have several customers in that ballpark. They're good people and good customers who, for various reasons, are unable to cut their own yards (however small). I know of dozens of gardeners in the area that would pick them up for less than what I charge them (or roughly the same) so I could let them go and know they're taken care of ... but why!?<p>Maybe I live in the heart of Scrubland and just don't know any better. I'm willing to learn. I have a dozen customers I can call right now and tell them their price is about to quadruple (so that I can make $200/hour at their place) or let them go. I have another dozen or so customers where I know I'm not making a good enough wage at better than $25/cut that I am planning serious action on, but I just don't see how cutting out the little guys I'm making money on is going to help. <p>Educate me. :)<p>-TGC<p><p><font size="1">Edited by: TGCummings

steven Bousquet
06-24-2000, 12:47 PM
your a scrub if 1. you think a belt drive toro is faster than my exmark lazer. 2. your spray rig is a gizzmo on a walk behind. 3.you think you have a lawn app business but treat less than 2 million feet per round. 4. you think employees a just ******s who bother you.

06-24-2000, 12:58 PM
you might be a scrub if you think a reel is on a rod!

06-24-2000, 01:12 PM
I'm devastated! I just found out I'm a &quot;scrub&quot;. But I'm a happy little scrub, with my new deisel powered Dixie Chopper. I mow so fast and grin so big I have to carry a tooth brush when I mow to knock the bugs off my teeth.

06-24-2000, 01:49 PM
Hello Everybody:<p>I was a scrub, I carried extension cords when I first started.<p>LOL, I've done body work with a Echo SRM 2501 before.<p>I was at a 36 unit condo site from hell. It was a 103 degrees & I had 3 trimmers & 2 blowers down, some how water had got into our 2 cycle fuel. This is only time this ever happened to me.<p>I was in asphalt parking lot, on my knees under the tail gate of truck trying to get a little shade, while removing water from units. <p>Air as thick as Pea Soup, about 2:00 or 3:00 & I could not keep my sweat band rung out enough, my eyes were on fire from sweat.<p>Good ole Mrs. Aggervatethehelloutofya was there trying to tell me about the 2 magnolia leaves under her car that we missed. I told her to please let us try to get our work done. She decided that I was rude & was complaining to others.<p>After a while there were about 4 or 5 of them you know whats there. All were wanting to make complaints. It was the longest 30 min. in my life, I was hoping they would get a good taste of what I got.<p>Well I fixed all but one Trimmer & when I started to put unit in back of my truck, they all wanted to talk to me.<p>LOL, I said wait one minute, I walked around to front of truck & held unit by shaft head end. Then I started to banging it in the center of hood & I was hitting it hard too.<p>LOL, when I finished, they were all gone, BTW they never bothered me again. <p>I hit so hard & so many times, that the rod that goes through the truck air cleaner busted the carb & had to go unhook one trailer & come back, get other trailer & leave the truck over night til I found another carb.<p>It was one of the best feelings I ever had in my life. Oh when I finished I threw it over truck into trailer & almost hit one of the guys laughing at me. The other 4 guys got trimmer hit one time & threw in back of trailer also. Till they were all done.<p>We almost died laughing. I was never a scrub after that. I just had to let go & get it out of my system!!!!!<p>----------<br>GrassMaster - Home: www.lawnservicing.com<br>My Start Up Page www.lawnservicing.com/startup/

06-24-2000, 03:15 PM
TGC, my minimum was 25$ 10 years ago. I think the price of everything has gone up since then due to inflation. Its just that when a contractor is willing to go back to 10 year old prices he keep that viscious cycle going. You may get a customer up to 40$ in a few years. Then a scrub will hand out a flyer saying he will do it for 20 or 25$. You may or may not get dumped for that scrub. This has been going on forever. That some of what this forum is about. With the seasonal hours so valueable you could be spending your time somewhere else making 35 per stop. Of the 25$ the government gets 25%. Fuel in equipment take some. Fuel in vehicle takes some. Miliage. Wear and tear on your equipment. You are running a seasonal business not working for hr rate at a factory where you are getting benefits. You have to pay all that out of what you are making. Anyway we have had this discussion so many times. It would pay for you to read the archives. Oh yes and the customer you are wroking for 25$ tell everyone they know that you are doing that. And they expect that rate too.<br><p><font size="1">Edited by: Charles

06-24-2000, 06:41 PM
Okay, Charles, if this has already been discussed ad naseum then I'll check the archives when I get some time. I don't want to hamper the boards with boring repeats.<p>I do think that one thing that may have a great effect out here on pricing, however, is that work *isn't* seasonal. We never have an offseason since we never get severe weather one way or another. It rains off and on from November to May, then stays mostly dry from June to October. I work year around on lawns. <p>I'll definitely look into it, though. If I'm doing something that's hurting my business or, potentially worse, the Industry, then I want to fix it...<p>-TGC

06-26-2000, 12:34 AM
Grassmaster<br>Quickstraw McGraw used to turn into El Kabong and smash people over the head with his Guitar with BubbaLouie at his side. Which is an arcane reference to a cartoon from the 70's.<p>I think we have all wanted to go nuts like you did. Now that I know there was one before me, I may have to give it a try.<p>

06-26-2000, 06:34 PM
I have one customer that I only charge $20 to cut her tiny-tiny yard. She's 87 years old barely lives off her s.s. check and a great lady. I wouldn't try to make a living doing this but 1 yard and a little charity never hurt anyone.

06-26-2000, 07:23 PM
All little old ladies will tell you they are &quot;barely&quot; living off their social security checks. You better get some of her bundle of money before the church does to build that new activity building to go with that sports arena they built last year

06-26-2000, 07:57 PM
you might be a scrub if...<br>*your house has wheels and your car doesn't. <br>*your belt buckle is bigger than your shoe size <br>*YOUR MOWERS GOT MORE MILES THAN YOUR PICKUP<br>*you're 47 and still in 3rd grade<br>* you think the tart carts are the &quot;cool&quot; buses<br>*the engine hanging in your yard is newer than the one in your car. <br>*You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.<br>*Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade. <p>Bryan<br><p>----------<br><br>&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.snowplow.web.com&quot;&gt;The Snowplow Homepage&lt;/a&gt;

John DiMartino
06-26-2000, 09:06 PM
Charles,the customers think we are getting rich mowing lawns for 30 a pop,they dont see what we have to pay out to stay in business.I notice the same for employees for the most part,they just see the checks and think its all yours.<p>----------<br>John D<br>

06-26-2000, 11:45 PM
Hey Grassmaster,,,Damn!!!!!<p>----------<br>Yesteryear L/S<br>Hollywood Fla

little green guy
06-27-2000, 01:48 AM
hey snow, i think you just descibed a hill billy.<p>you might be a scrub if you've never visited lawnsite

06-29-2000, 01:48 AM
Hi Everyone,<p>I am not sure that I have the right to post in this area but I have to <br>laugh at this Scrub thing. I have decided to call myself Doc Scrub. I think <br>that all of us have some of the traits of a Scrub. The problem is who is <br>man or woman enough to stand up and say &quot; 'YES I HAVE SOME SCRUB <br>CHARACTERISTICS'. I will work on them in order to better myself&quot;. I have <br>read some of your posts stating that you work for sums that our mowers <br>wouldn't even start up for but then I am not in your part of the country or <br>world nor do I know what will turn a good profit for you. If someone wants <br>to work for a loss or give their services away why should any of us <br>criticize or belittle him or her. It really is their business and their <br>right not ours. Maybe we should be searching for ways to aid them to lift <br>themselves up. We can always find something negative but maybe we should be <br>looking for the positive things in each other. The things to build on. If <br>anyone truly wants the negative then go buy a mirror, look deeply and you <br>will find sufficient negativity for a lifetime plus. Think of all the time <br>that has been spent in making negative posts. Let all of us use our time in <br>a positive, kind, understanding and encouraging way. Enjoy the balance of <br>the day.<p>Doc Scrub<p>

06-29-2000, 05:05 AM

06-29-2000, 05:15 AM

06-29-2000, 09:12 AM
Some of you have a such a simplistic earthly view Of GOd. I don't think God will judge people on how much they charge for their services &quot;gas station owner u charged to much for that gallon of gas u going to hell for that&quot; &quot;grocery store manager you chargeg too much for that loaf of bread you going to hell too&quot; Nor do I think God will send me to hell for charging too little which most of us do. I don't think God even cares about money. I do think God wants you to provide for your family. But some of you seem to live with your mamas or let you wife support you. Or in some parts of the country you live with your sister and a sheep(we want even go there). Some of you are soo gulible. Seniors are notorious for poor mouthing. They are experts at that. I get poor mouthed all the time by them. But the next time you see them they have went out and bought a new car or a new expensive toy. But some of them rarely even spend their money on anything but nessecities. Thinking they are going to take it with them after they die. But some of them are genuinely poor. But what kinda way to run a business is trying to judge people on how much money they have? Unless you search their house or see their bank statements you just never really know. You are not as a christian even suppose to judge people at all. Especially for the way they dress or look. And oh yes we all are getting sinfully rich lol. How many lawn service companies do you see on the fortune 500 list? The millionaire list? How many parents tell their daughter to go out and find themselves a good lawn maintenance man? Ever try to pick up a girl telling her you are a landscaper? I try to run my lawn service a business not a religious orginization. I think senoirs appreciate that I treat them equally. Not as some pathetic poor losers who need charity. Let me that during this long drought. I have found that most of my customers have no sympathy for the fact that i havent been to cut their grass for over a month. They could care less if i have any money to pay my bills. Nor do i expect them too. Seniors were the first to call me when it got a little dry and tell me not to come. No matter that some of them were paying the least. Because this is a BUSINESS relatioship. I don't want any charity either. Oh yes and Jesus said we should pay our taxes, but alot of you out there don't do that.<p><p><p><br><p><font size="1">Edited by: Charles

06-29-2000, 10:29 AM
Before God created the world with grass for us to mow, there was nothing? Where did God come from, did he create himself? There are many questions to ask God come judgement day, for him to criticize your behavior.<p>This is buisness, not church

lawrence stone
06-29-2000, 10:30 AM
maybe the tooth fairy or santa will come to<br>my rescue.<p>Religion is the opiate of the masses.<p>Get real dude these seniors have all the wealth. Get some of it b/4 they die b/4 they<br>pass it on to some loser drug addicted nephew who will piss it away in a year.

06-29-2000, 11:36 AM
will i'am past middle age my lawn service has done very will it's time i give a little back for all the commercial contracts that i have on going for over 14 years and they total over 100 with about 150 homes<p>----------<br>RICHARD<br>HICKMAN

06-29-2000, 11:45 AM
Well JRLawn, I am glad you can afford to do that. But alot of us can't. Why didnt you just say that in a professional manner like you just did? Instead of implying that some of us were less than christain because we didn't. This is why we should have seperation of church and state and maybe church and lawn business

06-29-2000, 11:59 AM
Stone<p>I love your post here. <p>How about...A scrub is someone who thinks the owners salary comes out of the profit margin.

06-29-2000, 12:03 PM

06-29-2000, 12:30 PM
tell that to the iranian people who are fighting for their freedom. The taliban women who cant even keep their jobs etc What if one day a muslim was elected prez of our country? And he said we all have to believe the way he does and 1 billion other muslims do. What if a muslim is the principle of a school and said thier way of life will be taught in schools? Hate to break this to you man. But christians are a minority in this world. This is my absolute last post on this subject(this week). What is Stone were elected prez and we all had to cut grazz with toros :)<br>Scrub(gulible)<br><p><font size="1">Edited by: Charles

06-29-2000, 07:58 PM
... if your helper rides on your ZTR, while on the trailer en route to your next job-you might be a scrub. (don't laugh, saw it today).

06-30-2000, 12:29 AM
You may be......<br>If your hazardous material spill kit is a box of maxipads<br> or <br>your haz. mat. kit is a set of stolen plates for your truck (or van....)<br> or <br>youve chosen to spray barefoot so your shoes dont get all stinky<br> or you mow so all your striping points to Mecca......<p> Scrub.

06-30-2000, 12:48 AM
If god is your Green Industry Consultant on pricing jobs! Don't get me wrong, I believe in God, even make it to church once and a while, but I see that to many people you God's name here to stick up for them after posting some stupid stuff. Leave him outta this! It's not his fault your having problems.<p>----------<br>&lt;a href=&quot;http://communities.msn.com/guidosequipmentpics/&quot;&gt;&quot;Guido&quot;&lt;/a&gt;<br>David M. Famiglietti

07-02-2000, 10:04 PM
If you have a plastic Jesus mounted to your mower, youre probably a scrub.<p>Bill

07-02-2000, 10:21 PM
Brass would be more respectful...<br><p><font size="1">Edited by: toroguy

07-02-2000, 10:38 PM
If you guys don't knock it off, Nilsson's going pass the plate.

07-04-2000, 08:46 PM
you might be a scrub if...you sit up at 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning talking about whose scrubby in the green industry.<p><br><p><font size="1">Edited by: doug

07-08-2000, 02:33 AM
Hey toroman, God is a Spirit and was neither created nor can he be distroyed. He has always existed from eternity past and will always exist. He is not a created being like you or I, He is the creator. <br>John