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View Full Version : i am building the perfect lawn mowing machine, can anyone guess what it is?


bobbygedd
01-07-2004, 04:56 PM
ok boys and girls, i am building the "perfect lawn mowing machine". i started a few months back, it will be ready march 15th, at which time i will post multiple pictures. can anyone guess what it is? anyone even care?

lawnwizards
01-07-2004, 04:59 PM
are you adding a cooler rack for your coors?

rodfather
01-07-2004, 05:05 PM
Maybe it's a big electric WB with solar panels so bobby can sell it to states like California where emissions is big issue. Now bobby becomes a millionaire practically overnight...haha

Ryan Lightning
01-07-2004, 05:14 PM
Are you having a kid, So when he grows up he will do all the work for you.

sbvfd592
01-07-2004, 05:23 PM
hmmmm

odin
01-07-2004, 05:24 PM
a oversized bong with a mower deck?

bobbygedd
01-07-2004, 05:40 PM
u suck!

FrankenScagMachines
01-07-2004, 05:42 PM
an Exmark that mows by itself?

pjslawncare/landscap
01-07-2004, 05:46 PM
A goat that pisses coors light and poops fert :rolleyes:

lawnagent
01-07-2004, 05:48 PM
Originally posted by FrankenScagMachines
an Exmark that mows by itself?

That would be perfect in my eye! A mower that mows and trims while I sit in the truck and drink lemonade!:laugh:

bob
01-07-2004, 05:49 PM
Are you getting BHB to help with the design?

Wells
01-07-2004, 05:54 PM
The wife and mother-in-law are going to do all the mowing allowing you more time to lift weights and drink beer in the basement.

bobbygedd
01-07-2004, 07:06 PM
so far, you are all wrong, a mile off. cmon boys, be more creative

Ray & Karen
01-07-2004, 07:09 PM
Give us hint

proenterprises
01-07-2004, 07:17 PM
a big ass easy chair complete with a built in keg, tv, fridge full of hot dogs, nachos, a cell phone holster, dvd player, computer (so you can even have lawnsite in the field) and a bucket for your porno mags? oh yeah-and a mower deck on the front:dizzy:

bobbygedd
01-07-2004, 07:18 PM
no! you are all entrepenurs, you are all creative, and you all have read all the stuff i have written. now, what is the "perfect lawn mowing machine"?

jeffex
01-07-2004, 07:22 PM
one you don't have to start, haul , repair , or use and it cuts a perfect lawn anyway. Oh yeah it collects from the customer for you in cash!

TRex
01-07-2004, 07:42 PM
You have set up a fool proof way of getting a crew to mow and do the labor while you run the business.

mower_babe
01-07-2004, 07:52 PM
your wife?

troblandscape
01-07-2004, 07:57 PM
A mower that turns cut grass into beer:drinkup:

Barkleymut
01-07-2004, 08:23 PM
A mower that hides a super strong robot underneath. When a customer starts complaining to you, you simply unleash the wrath of Mr. Roboto. You then slap a bagger onto the mower and clean up the left over body parts and tell Mr. Roboto to go into hiding until next week. Did I win?

Doogiegh
01-07-2004, 09:01 PM
I'm just waiting for the Pictures on March 15th! It best be ready..

It's gotta be something with automatic payments, drinking beer and death to his in-laws all together wrapped up in one..

J-mike
01-07-2004, 09:12 PM
Does it look anything like this?

BigEd
01-07-2004, 09:18 PM
Perfect lawn mowing machine would be a reliable person that is healthy ,in shape or physically fit.With a wealth of knowledge in turf.Are you bettering yourself for the start of the new season in March??

proenterprises
01-07-2004, 09:21 PM
wow-with half of the replies that weve posted here its pretty clear that we all envision bobby as a big ass drunk:D :drinkup:

bastalker
01-07-2004, 09:22 PM
bobby, I think they beat ya to it.... They have this mower now, that if ya program it to yer yard, you can kick back and watch it mow.(solor powered)

Works like them vacuums(spell check!!!!) that vacumm(spell check again please!!)vacuums everything up while yer at work, out drinkin, at home etc.....an ya never have ta lay a hand on that thing....

Course wouldn't stripe a yard the way I do........

Grassmechanic
01-07-2004, 09:33 PM
Originally posted by pjslawncare/landscap
A goat that pisses coors light and poops fert :rolleyes: Good one. I thought all goats pissed coors light. Anyways, he hired his homeless buddy in the basement to do his mowing. Uh oh, he's gonna need a bunch of goats....

pcnservices
01-07-2004, 09:42 PM
A whole lot of funny innovations here. I have to go with that goat idea of Mike (PJSLawncare)
PC

Doc Pete2
01-07-2004, 10:00 PM
Originally posted by bobbygedd
ok boys and girls, i am building the "perfect lawn mowing machine". i started a few months back, it will be ready march 15th, at which time i will post multiple pictures. can anyone guess what it is? anyone even care?

That's easy, I already know. It's any machine that's making money for you, that "you ain't operating"..........:D

Wells
01-07-2004, 10:18 PM
Ive got it... You've been training a group of trunk monkeys during the off season...

You'll pull up to the jobsite, pop the trunk and out pops six monkeys..two of them are trained to mow, two are trained to trim, one is trained to blow off the walks and one is trained to retrieve you cold beers from the cooler.

Then when you run into an unpleasant customer you pop the trunk a second time and out comes the biggest monkey in the group with a tire-iron in hand to take care of the finner business details.

Sounds like you've found a winner as monkeys are willing to work for bananas leaving you with 100% of the profit.

LawnMower
01-07-2004, 10:18 PM
A walk behind mower that has the speed of a ZTR. With an awesome sulky.

Thats the mower I wished existed.

the scaper
01-07-2004, 10:37 PM
i'm gonna go out on a limb here, how bout a lazer with an old rebuilt chevy 350, self sharpening blades, and a large breasted young seniorita to operate it - naked! *note to customer: ALL JOBS ARE PRE-PAID!

DUSTYCEDAR
01-07-2004, 11:04 PM
? time will tell

luke125
01-07-2004, 11:07 PM
Originally posted by Ryan Lightning
Are you having a kid, So when he grows up he will do all the work for you.

im going with this guy

LawnPerfect
01-07-2004, 11:07 PM
Give us some hints Bobby.

olderthandirt
01-07-2004, 11:52 PM
Yep, its a shed in the back yard!!!! gonna get yourself a couple hispanic guys suck some govt. sudsidy $$ to let em sleep in it after they do the mowing. Double your pay and no work, that's the perfect mower.

Mac

Doc Pete2
01-07-2004, 11:55 PM
Originally posted by LawnMower
A walk behind mower that has the speed of a ZTR. With an awesome sulky. Thats the mower I wished existed.

OH, why did you have to go and say that:p !!!
It's here.
25 horsepower
55" cut
10mph forward, 5mph backward
50" rear wheelbase
10" wide rear tires
No levers to pull

Wells
01-08-2004, 12:28 AM
How about something like one of these..

PaulJ
01-08-2004, 12:47 AM
Originally posted by LawnMower
A walk behind mower that has the speed of a ZTR. With an awesome sulky.

Thats the mower I wished existed.

It does!

Phishook
01-08-2004, 12:54 AM
come on how are you going to have a laser beam irrigation system ready by 3/15?

Doster's L & L
01-08-2004, 01:17 AM
OK! Here it is! Check it out! I'm sure that we are really close to hittin it, but bobby is just layin low till we get it right. What if we combine all the previous into one? It's a goat/solar powered hybrid recliner with optional dvd, cooler, super bong, internet connections (for no other use than to get on lawnsite, of course), also has the cell phone attachment (for when he makes "booty" calls) and when she's not home the porno mag stand is nearby. Other functional uses for this secretive machine are that it turns the cut grass into Coors Lite, aka 'the god's nectar'. The goat in the machine will, also excreet 'the god's nectar' and poop fert according to each lawns needs. And solar power will ease the minds of the env't conscious customers as well as provide low operation cost. This machine will be run by the monkeys Wells mentioned. However, the sixth monkey is not a monkey. You were mistaken on that one account. He will have the scaper's lovely, large breasted seniorita to fetch his beer... naked!!! WOO HOOOOO!!!!!!!
Other optional equipment come with the Chevy 350 for those of us that are less concerned with the environment, but more concerned with things that really matter. SPEED and EFFICIENCY! Solar battery not included!!! LOL

Doster's L & L
01-08-2004, 01:23 AM
Hey Well, is that you in the bottom pic peddling the lawnchair/reelmower? LOL j/k

WeatherMan
01-08-2004, 09:32 AM
Well how bout it bobby let us see!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bobbygedd
01-08-2004, 09:36 AM
nope, not showin it, and i'm not tellin what it is. pictures on 3/15/04.

65hoss
01-08-2004, 09:37 AM
A riding beer can?

paponte
01-08-2004, 10:58 AM
Perfect mowing machine? How can you build me Bobby? I already exist.!! I also have alot of fringe benefits. :gunsfirin

walker-talker
01-08-2004, 11:45 AM
a goat that gets his fuel from empty beer cans?

twins_lawn_care
01-08-2004, 11:49 AM
BEWARE THE IDES OF MARCH!!!

man, this thing is going to be awesome huh bobby?

I thought up some weird stuff after a couple cases myself :drinkup:

mbricker
01-08-2004, 02:47 PM
You and your help pull up to the curb, unload and set up portable fence sections around the perimeter of lawn. Open gate, run in a flock of sheep. Leave to play video games at the 7-11. Come back, load sheep, load fence, go to next job.

bobbygedd
01-09-2004, 12:39 PM
well? you guys really dissapoint me

Doster's L & L
01-09-2004, 01:22 PM
How about a mower with a weedeater head attached to eliminate trimming?

twins_lawn_care
01-09-2004, 01:37 PM
Ok,
It took a couple beers to clear my head and start to think straight.

You built a rack system, kind of like Santa's Sleigh, except all the holes are lined up horizontally. Then, you can strap in all the non-paying, deadbeat, pita customers, sit back on your lazy boy, and whip them until they work as efficiently as your Z by making them chew up the grass. Of course you'd have to strap in a few to drag behind as well, to get those nice stripes everyone wants!

I would think that your lazy boy would be well equipped as previously described in the post also!

:D

bobbygedd
01-09-2004, 02:13 PM
you know what dosters? i really thought about that once,, only one problem, i have no mechanical ability

rodfather
01-09-2004, 02:19 PM
Originally posted by bobbygedd
only one problem, i have no mechanical ability


Well then, who is building this thing...benny?

Fareway Lawncare
01-09-2004, 05:08 PM
Bobby's work in progress.

Fareway Lawncare
01-09-2004, 05:18 PM
Here it is w/deck removed. Wiring up the sound system.

FrankenScagMachines
01-09-2004, 05:56 PM
ROFLMAO

troblandscape
01-09-2004, 06:07 PM
Looks like something BHB built, not Bobby:laugh:

the scaper
01-09-2004, 06:33 PM
is that a bomb strapped onto the front of that thing??

sbvfd592
01-09-2004, 08:00 PM
WOW

pcnservices
01-09-2004, 08:10 PM
Hey Fareway,
In the 2nd picture you posted is that Bobby trimming in the background??

bobbygedd
01-09-2004, 08:16 PM
you guys are so mean to me, that's ok, on march 15th you will be green with envy.

Lazer_Z
01-09-2004, 09:20 PM
I belive in ya Bobby don't give up

And it will out run a SWB right?

bobbygedd
01-09-2004, 09:31 PM
what's a swb? well, they laughed at thomas edison, they laughed at ben franklin, and now thier laughing at me. i don't care. i think they're just jealous

Lazer_Z
01-09-2004, 09:34 PM
Hustler's hydro w/b

bobbygedd
01-09-2004, 09:40 PM
dude, the" perfect lawn mowing machine " will out perform any machine out there.

Lazer_Z
01-09-2004, 09:49 PM
Well it's going to be a long rest of the winter for ya then good luck with it i can't wait to see it come March 15th

bigshoe
01-12-2004, 07:01 PM
Bobby I can not wait for march 15th to come. To see your new creation

Heron Cove PM
01-12-2004, 08:01 PM
1 that is extremely way over priced, complains it's not making enough, and curses out ALL your customers for you with out you even having to lift a finger. WELL... :D because it will do that for you too.

JimLewis
01-13-2004, 03:43 AM
Bobby, will you let us play 20 questions with you? Yes or No questions?

Does this machine use petroleum byproducts (e.g. motor oil, gas) in any way?

Mickhippy
01-13-2004, 05:00 AM
Originally posted by jimlewis
Bobby, will you let us play 20 questions with you? Yes or No questions?

Does this machine use petroleum byproducts (e.g. motor oil, gas) in any way?

Its Deisel and runs on the second hand oil from the "Fish n Chip" shop!

dfor
01-13-2004, 08:20 AM
Is it YOU? Lifting weights all winter, turning your body into the ultimate machine. Getting ready for the upcoming season.

bobbygedd
01-13-2004, 11:07 AM
i aint talkin

dobehap
01-13-2004, 11:32 AM
I think Dfor got it, it must be Bobby himself.

He often talks that you are the most important tool, machine, and how you should maintain/ take care of yourself...
and then there is a this supersets education...it must be bobby himself.

Bobby, no need to wait till march, RodFather got a shot of you in your basement.

Doc Pete
01-13-2004, 11:39 AM
Originally posted by bobbygedd
ok boys and girls, i am building the "perfect lawn mowing machine".

Bobby, I now realize this is a joke. Suggesting "YOU" can "BUILD" the perfect lawnmower is the tip off. You don't know how to build..........Go ahead, though and let the cat out of the bag.............. The truth is you are buying my old Hustler SWB protoype, which "IS" the perfect lawnmower.payup :cool2: payup :cool2: payup :cool2: payup :cool2: payup :cool2:

Movinfr8
01-13-2004, 11:53 AM
I think he just wants to "build" the post with the most hits EVER even more than "peein in the bushes" and if ya have an extra 30 minutes search and read it!!!
sorry bout the shameless plug bobby.
I agree that yer pumpin iron to become the ultimate mowing machine!

rodfather
01-13-2004, 02:37 PM
I think benny (his live-in basement friend) who's also a mechanic is building it and bobby's taking all the credit...I remember him saying once before that he wasn't mechanically inclined.

sildoc
01-13-2004, 03:05 PM
He said it was for landscape maintenance but I think he is joking cause his livin is lookin over his shoulder.
In reality He is building a get the hell out machine and never come back. It will be warm come march (or at least warmer), and this machine will lift, dispose of, and guard all entrances to ones house. All you have to do is provide one such stinky sock or dirty underoos to machine and you are worry free from such intruders.
I do belive the U.S. Patent laws restrict these types of machines to be programed for mother-in-laws. Main reason is Significant other (other wise known as wife), gets Bit__Y!

Turfdude
01-13-2004, 04:12 PM
I bet the fuel source is urine from many coors lites :D !

rodfather
01-13-2004, 05:24 PM
Originally posted by Turfdude
I bet the fuel source is urine from many coors lites :D !


You gonna get it now Bob...LOL

burnandreturn
01-13-2004, 05:41 PM
A goat on a tether! cuts grass, weed removal, trimming and fertilizes all in one pass. Don't know about the stripes though!

promower
01-13-2004, 07:37 PM
Should put some nitrous and hydrolics an that thing maybe go out mowing in a big purple fuzzy cape to. Here comes Bobby big pimping in the perfect lawn mowing machine!!

bobbygedd
01-13-2004, 08:47 PM
nice try guys. you even got the hottest chic on lawnsite to instant messege me and try to get it out of me. but, my keen senses picked her off right away as a spy, and i didn't budge in spite of some pretty tempting trade offs. i ain't talkin, till 3/15/04

cantoo
01-13-2004, 09:03 PM
I been kinda wondering where old Stone got to. I guess he's the one living in your basement and the perfect machine is a 30 year old Toro WBH running nitrous.

Doc Pete
01-13-2004, 09:10 PM
Originally posted by bobbygedd
nice try guys. you even got the hottest chic on lawnsite to instant messege me and try to get it out of me.

I beg your pardon, I didn't try anything:blush:

Heron Cove PM
01-13-2004, 09:24 PM
Originally posted by promower
...Here comes Bobby big pimping in the perfect lawn mowing machine!!

http://www.stopstart.freeserve.co.uk/smilie/pimp3.gif "Laid back, with his mind on his money and his money on his mind."

mattydjakd
01-13-2004, 09:41 PM
This hot chick you speak of........what are her specifications?

the scaper
01-13-2004, 10:01 PM
Originally posted by mattydjakd
This hot chick you speak of........what are her specifications? large breasted, and operates a lazer- naked!

Turfdude
01-13-2004, 10:12 PM
Originally posted by mattydjakd
This hot chick you speak of........what are her specifications?

She's 4' nuthin, flat head & big ears
:eek:

bobbygedd
01-13-2004, 11:27 PM
hey, that's my wife you're talkin about

bayfish
01-13-2004, 11:58 PM
I got a feeling we're going to see you striking a pose in speedos.

the scaper
01-14-2004, 12:08 AM
Originally posted by Turfdude
She's 4' nuthin, flat head & big ears
:eek: that sounds like the one i used to turn upside down and carry like a six pack!

lawnman_scott
03-12-2004, 05:28 PM
You have 3 days left.

sildoc
03-12-2004, 08:41 PM
Thanks Lawnman_scott. I forgot completly about it. Good thing you remembered the due date now the pressure is on Bobby to finish it on time.

turfguy
03-12-2004, 08:45 PM
who is building this thing...... orange county choppers????

rodfather
03-12-2004, 09:05 PM
Yup, his best joysee bud is waiting too...but I think I already know what it is...

Doogiegh
03-12-2004, 09:40 PM
Orange County... heheh.. Watching a repeat of the Mikey Bike on right now, started 9:00pm eastern time.. :)

rookiemower
03-12-2004, 10:27 PM
i can't wait to see this thing bobby, you got everyone in suspense, set the countdown clock 5-4-3-2-1

rookiemower
03-12-2004, 10:41 PM
http://www.tshirthell.com/shirts/tshirt.php?sku=a268
Bobby has started this company for side cash:p

proenterprises
03-12-2004, 11:11 PM
soooo....whens the debut date now?

bobbygedd
03-13-2004, 07:42 AM
wait till you see it, you're gonna love it. it's quite a piece of machinery, and looks good too. any day now guys, any day

LB Landscaping
03-13-2004, 07:52 AM
Bobby your killing us with all this mystery!!!!!!!:D :D

pcnservices
03-13-2004, 07:55 PM
Originally posted by bobbygedd
.... it will be ready march 15th, at which time i will post multiple pictures.
Just a reminder Bobby - 2 more days.....:blob3:

bigshoe
03-13-2004, 08:12 PM
I personally can not Wait to see this!

TaylorLawn
03-13-2004, 08:20 PM
3541 posts x 5 min avg. per post, = 17705 minutes posting, which = 295 hours @ 30$ per hour, = $8850, Lawnsite owes bobby $8850. You guys need to move to a location that cuts year round, but I admit I am as curious as the next to find out.

tiedeman
03-13-2004, 09:02 PM
I almost totally forget about this thread...make that 3542 Taylor

JB1LNDSCPR
03-13-2004, 11:07 PM
Can't wait till the 16th

twins_lawn_care
03-15-2004, 09:05 AM
Sooooooooooooooooooooooooo???

I'm running out of finger nails to bite off waiting to see, Bobby?:eek:

grass_cuttin_fool
03-15-2004, 09:15 AM
today is the big day, what time is the unveiling??

turfguy
03-15-2004, 09:51 AM
well?????????????? my doctor said the stress of waiting to see this might be bad for my heart.......come on lets see

Turn's Lawn Care
03-15-2004, 09:54 AM
Bobygedd, Enough already........pictures...... I'm dyin here....

NEWINNJ
03-15-2004, 10:00 AM
Bobby. It's the 15th. Tell your wife to hurry up and have the baby. We are dying to see him or her.

proenterprises
03-15-2004, 10:36 AM
Originally posted by NEWINNJ
Bobby. It's the 15th. Tell your wife to hurry up and have the baby. We are dying to see him or her.

is that what it is?

Lux Lawn
03-15-2004, 10:40 AM
Bobby must be working today we might have to wait until after work.His priority's are really screwed up.:D

bobbygedd
03-15-2004, 11:19 AM
lux, i already posted it, i'll bring it back to the first page for you

Lux Lawn
03-15-2004, 11:34 AM
Bobby

Thats one bad looking machine.

Aproct
03-15-2004, 11:57 AM
bobbygeed,

I must be missing something, I can't find it? Is that the perfect machine? You can cut grass but the machine is invisible?

lilred731
03-15-2004, 04:06 PM
Where is it Bobby?