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  #1  
Old 03-22-2007, 11:13 PM
marckxman marckxman is offline
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New customers. Phrases that make you RUN AWAY

Most of us have been in the biz long enough to read between the lines pretty well. What phrases do you hear that let you know right off the bat that this is NOT going to work out.

I will start with a few of my favs. I actually heard all of these this week.

1. I figure you're not too busy this time of year so I thought I would help you out. (Reality: It's SPRING. The only people around here who are not running like crazy are too stupid or stoned to answer the phone.)

2. I only need two rhodys pruned but I really want you to come out on Saturday or Sunday so I can pick your brain an some upgrades my son and I can do. (Meaning: I want to utilize your time, experience, gas money, and good will so I can cut you out of the money end of the project.)

3. I am retired but kind of picky. I need my lawn mowed today and then every 10 to 14 days there after. (Definition: I need you to drop everything and get over here now. I will be there to follow you around the yard. I want great service but I don't want to pay for it.)
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  #2  
Old 03-22-2007, 11:35 PM
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THEGOLDPRO THEGOLDPRO is offline
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my other lawnguy doesnt wanna weed the poison ivy from my pacasandra, how much do you charge??
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  #3  
Old 03-22-2007, 11:36 PM
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DLCS DLCS is offline
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1. I'm on a fixed income.

2. I'll call you when it needs cut.

3. Cut the grass really short, so it doesn't grow as fast.

4. Do you have a push mower?:

5. I want my lawn cut every 10 days in the Spring, then when it slows down in the summer, I want it cut twice a month or I'll call you when it needs cut.

6. I don't want a Spring clean-up, i can do that myself.
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  #4  
Old 03-22-2007, 11:38 PM
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QualityLawnCare4u QualityLawnCare4u is offline
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Let me see,

1) I am on a fixed income. Translated you are expected to do it for a sandwich and glass of water and be d*mn happy to get that from them.

2) I am looking for cheap lawncare, that ends my phone call right there.

3) The last guy did good work but quit showing up, translated means the cheap sob's did not pay him and are deadbeats. Run Forrest run!

4)My grass only needs cutting every 6 weeks, it grows real slow. Another
cheapazz.

5) one of my favorites, when you come to look at my yard you might want to lock up everything. Means there are drug dealers and hookers everywhere.

6) Another favorite, My yard has not been done since, umm, umm maybe about a year ago and there are a few limbs and leaves on the ground. Meaning the yard is overgrown with dog fennels and full of beer bottles, bycycle chains,car rims,monster truck sitting on blocks, not counting 4 trailor loads of limbs and leaves 5 inches thick If you are stupid enough to do it that will be the only cleaning until next year when Larry the cable guy of Jeff Foxworthy is coming to visit.

7) can you cut it at half an inch so it does not come back as fast, another cheap pos!
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  #5  
Old 03-22-2007, 11:46 PM
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richallseasons richallseasons is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by THEGOLDPRO View Post
my other lawnguy doesnt wanna weed the poison ivy from my pacasandra, how much do you charge??
HEY that guy called me too !!!!!
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  #6  
Old 03-22-2007, 11:57 PM
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mosmgras mosmgras is offline
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Over the phone: "How much will it cost me to fix my yard? You don't have to buy anything, just give me a list of stuff that I need and I'll go the Home Depot."

Then the best finisher I have ever heard: "I can't pay you cash but if you'll meet me at the Home Depot when I go to get the fertilizer and stuff, I'll buy you something on my credit card."

Umm... yea.
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  #7  
Old 03-23-2007, 12:15 AM
topsites topsites is offline
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We can't seem to find a lawn guy that will help us / Every lawn guy we call blablabla / The last lawn guy this and that and omg...

Quote:
Originally Posted by DLCS View Post
1. I'm on a fixed income.
LOL well so is everybody I've ever met, including myself.

But I did a job today for a lady who said that and it was ok, but when she said it I sure felt the dread coming.
Turned out she wanted some brush cut down, bunch of chiggery sticky prickly crap but all it took was an hour with the chainsaw and the hedge trimmers, and I got $60.
The guy before me quoted her $800...

But I can kinda see it, the job in and of itself didn't make a whole lot of sense, not getting into it other than I didn't really care whether it made sense or not, she obviously wanted it done and when I told her the price she was quite happy... But I've ran from jobs that didn't make sense before, too, this one just seemed ok, guess it was.

Did waste 5-10 minutes bs'ing around, but I found this tolerable.

>> This is the reason I always say you have to let them have one red flag for free, you just never know.
But most folks that are going to be a problem can't seem to stop throwing the comments, usually by the 2nd red flag I am turning around to leave but there are times they get a half dozen or better past me before I'm like whoa ... lol.

Quote:
4)My grass only needs cutting every 6 weeks, it grows real slow. Another
cheapazz.
Oh no, worse, but in a nutshell, yeah.

Quote:
when you come to look at my yard you might want to lock up everything.
never heard that one LOL will have to remember it thou

Last edited by topsites; 03-23-2007 at 12:25 AM.
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  #8  
Old 03-23-2007, 12:20 AM
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THEGOLDPRO THEGOLDPRO is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by richallseasons View Post
HEY that guy called me too !!!!!
haha yeah this old lady called me was like do you mow lawns, blah blah blah, then when i got there she was like yeah i allready have a lawn guy but he doesnt wanna do the poison ivy how much??? i just walked away.
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  #9  
Old 03-23-2007, 12:25 AM
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Liquidfast Liquidfast is offline
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I want to sign up and I'll call you when it needs the first cut.

(I'll do the spring clean up myself is a dead giveaway)

They come running up to your truck and stop you to tell you that it doesn't need cutting this week.....forgot to call = instant drop.

If the customer refuses to pay prior to the cut.

After you do a one time cut, the customer states that you agreed to throw in the mulberry tree, edging and weed removal.
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  #10  
Old 03-23-2007, 12:36 AM
topsites topsites is offline
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Here's one I dislike: Come on IN! (even more so from a complete stranger).
Then: Have a seat, we'd like to ask you a few questions (translation: we are about to waste one or two hours of your time talking about seemingly important stuff because we want you to impress us by showing us how much you care and how much you know, but the real reason we are doing this is to slowly but surely let you know who is the boss here, but we will be very polite about it all and since we will pretend to pay attention to every word you say and will engage in meaningful conversation it is so you will hardly notice until it's too late, ok?). Oh, and after the 'interview' they say: Ok well we have to think about it but we'll let you know...
Your brain is going: Man, what a downer, I gave it my all, geez! But, not to worry (well, yes, worry).
Older folks can be extremely good at this one, but don't think young'uns won't do it, it helps if they live in a BIG house and want you to do all KINDS of work for them.
Time goes by and just about when you forgot about this, they suddenly call you (this time frame is usually two weeks and you are one done for fool if you get excited since the answer is YES, which that's the whole idea behind this little evil plot lmaolol I done fell for this one a few times over).
Conclusion: You are now their lawn boy, come hither johnyboy, yes you're a good boy, good boy.

> I'd like an estimate for year-long grass cutting...
Then, when I get there I find LEAVES, lots of them, more than I can just run the Wb over.

My favorite thou is when they start with this on the phone, I really appreciate it when they save me the trip out, no I'm not being sarcastic, the worst is when it doesn't start until I'm already done estimating lol.

Last edited by topsites; 03-23-2007 at 12:46 AM.
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