Oh don't you like it when your familly thinks you are a failure

Discussion in 'Heavy Equipment & Pavement' started by Gravel Rat, Jan 9, 2010.

  1. whosedog

    whosedog LawnSite Senior Member
    Posts: 730

    Sounds like your parents are abusive,not physical just mental abuse which can hurt more. My father(may he rest in peace) never hit his wife or kids,but sometimes he had a bad temper and a sharp tongue that hurt more than a belt ever would.Now that I have kids of my own I try to be supportive of them but sometimes find myself saying things that I regret later,just like my dad.Last week I called one of my sons a ----ing idiot ,he looked at me and said "you made me what I am; it's your genes that created me."I apologized later and try to keep my emotions in check,I don't know why we sometimes hurt those we love the most.Maybe its the stress of too much time together stuck inside on these long winter days.I have to go to church today,sometimes that can help me get my priorities in order again.
     
  2. AWJ Services

    AWJ Services LawnSite Platinum Member
    from Ga
    Posts: 4,276

    I think the only thing abusive is having to read posts by a grown man crying all of the time.
     
  3. tnmtn

    tnmtn LawnSite Bronze Member
    from NE Tn.
    Posts: 1,017

    GR,
    it is hard to feel sympathetic, many of us feed families, pay for our own houses, insurance, equipment, shops, whatever. you pay for a truck and rent at mom and dads. the other thing is on these forums there are many who were the first to try things. whether it be KSSS and his laser grader or ARP and mulching. maybe not the first in the country but in their area. on the other hand we can go to the history of your posts and read endlessly on how things won't work in your area instead of how it can be adapted to work in your area. another funny example is your posts relating to needing a 4wd truck now. i remember a couple years back when you very clearly said repeatedly how its up to a drivers skill and how 2wd is all thats needed. well, apparently now you have learned diffrent. wouldn't it have been nice to learn from others suggestions then and not be in the place you are now.
    you need to take a very big humility pill. maybe realize there are things you don't know and that instead of condemming what others do as impossible to work where you live think how to make it work.
    As far as working with your hands. it sounds nice. almost rustic in the old pioneer spirit. but realize that most of the equipment folks on this forum run is to make work more efficient and cost effective than doin it by hand. you bring a shovel and rake and i'll bring my dingo and a couple attachments. lets see who finishes first and brings home more money after expenses.
    you do have kowledge, i listened to it when i purchaased my F-350 idi. good call it has been everything and better than you described. try not to reinvent the wheel just modify it for diffrent applications.
    if this becomes impossible for you and you make no more changes than the last 2 years then it may be your parents know you best. take their advice if you won't take ours. or prove them right.
    not meant to bash you and i wish you

    good luck,
     
  4. ccstrebe

    ccstrebe LawnSite Senior Member
    Posts: 576

    I'm just reading between the lines here, but it sounds to me like the parents are wishing you were out on your own.

    The way they are looking at it is if you are a grown man still living at home and can afford a new payment for something they don't think you need, then you should be using that money to support yourself instead.

    I'm not sure how old you are but if you are over 25yr old then you should have been out on your own years ago. I got nine kids and the four oldest were all out on ther own or married by the time they were 20.

    I suspect the parents have been a little lax with you on not kicking you out of the nest and now they are regretting it.

    Just calling it like I see it, sorry dude.
     
  5. punt66

    punt66 LawnSite Fanatic
    Posts: 8,538

    hahaha this post cracks me up. Abusive? If you mean by not pushing the little baby birdie out of the nest then i agree. But otherwise.. hahahahh
     
  6. ksss

    ksss LawnSite Fanatic
    Posts: 7,126

    Tnmtn said it as kindly and yet straight forward as possible. You would be good to follow the advice. I will add just one more piece of advice. After approx. 6 years of reading your posts, I think you need to some professional counseling. I am being neither funny nor cruel. I think you could benefit from learning how to cope with life. I don't know if mental health is also free in Canada, but even if it is not you should look into it. There is no shame in it. Most everyone can benefit from it, I know I have at different times. Look into it. You have some issues that you had better come to terms with.
     
  7. AWJ Services

    AWJ Services LawnSite Platinum Member
    from Ga
    Posts: 4,276

    If GR went and seen some sort of professional counselor can you imagine how traumatic it would be for the Counselor!
     
  8. YellowDogSVC

    YellowDogSVC LawnSite Gold Member
    from TX
    Posts: 3,752

    It just blows my mind to think that property values are that high in BC. What if you move further out of town? heck, I live in an area where EVERYBODY in the 3rd world is moving to and $300,000 will get you something very, very nice with some property to spread out on. What is the big draw to BC that raises the prices so high? It can't be the weather? Someone explain this to me.
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2010
  9. YellowDogSVC

    YellowDogSVC LawnSite Gold Member
    from TX
    Posts: 3,752


    That's a lot of kids! Awesome. I imagine Thansgiving buys out half the supermarket! Any of your kids following your line of work?
     
  10. bobcat_ron

    bobcat_ron LawnSite Fanatic
    Posts: 10,082

    Come to the West Coast and see for yourself, go to the Sunshine Coast, the Gulf Islands, Whistler, Sea to Sky Highway, Fraser Valley, Vancouver Island, I could go on and on, there is some extremely beautiful places here, we aren't called "Beautiful British Columbia" for nothing. My Mom and Dad had guests from Holland that own a private shipping and export company, he takes his wife with him on a huge barge/tug with a full apartment style living quarters on board, and he's been in every shipping lane there is in Europe. He's seen lots of country.
    They spent 4 weeks here, and they were floored when they saw the West Coast. Everyone we have ever had the pleasure of putting up in our home for a few weeks is speechless when they see Hell's Gate or the Fraser Canyon in Fall. And that is the just beginning.
    They are coming back with the entire family after the Olympics.

    So basically, we have higher costs of living and property taxes because of our natural beauty here.
     

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