Commerial sales letter hook line...

Wells

LawnSite Member
Location
SLC UT
I'm putting together my 2004 commercial sales letter and I need a good hook line...Something to grab their attention and keep them reading on.

Somewhere betwen 2 to 8 words long.

Any ideas?
 
OP
Wells

Wells

LawnSite Member
Location
SLC UT
So nobody other that olderthandirt can come up with a hook line?

Whats up with that? If I was to create a thread about a honda pulling a trailer I would get more than 4 pages of replys.

Someone has to have one that worked well in the past. Come on a little help over here pleasssseee.
 

Mykster

LawnSite Senior Member
Location
Arlington, WA
Never had a hook line or anything along those lines so I can't of much help.

How about "We are the other side"
 
I dont know if a few words will really get their attention. Possibly you could add in a picture or 2 of your work and get their attention by showing top notch results.
 
OP
Wells

Wells

LawnSite Member
Location
SLC UT
Think I found one that will work.
Thank you to those that responded.
 

sildoc

LawnSite Silver Member
Just messin with you wells.
As we (most of us anyways) Know you have to have yourself sold in the first 3 lines. Other wise you might as well forget it.
Words like FREE, Extra, Included are catchy and will get people to read more.

I in a employment application added in the first job section that I would do 1 day free of charge.
Now mind you this was no burger job and to this day I still work there.
It was the final selling point. Landed me 3 bucks an hour over a guy that had been there 5 years(he doesn't know that though).
And They still paid me for my first day.
I beat out serveral people that were way more qualified than me.

Free is a powerfull word.
 
You know that other industries dont have to put in words like FREE in their advertisements. I think landscaping and lawn care have to be the only industry where we have to give something away to get business.
 

sildoc

LawnSite Silver Member
Originally posted by NCSULandscaper
You know that other industries dont have to put in words like FREE in their advertisements. I think landscaping and lawn care have to be the only industry where we have to give something away to get business.

What do you mean we are the only ones?

Have you not seen a buy one get one free advertisement.
OR buy for 5.99 and get a 5.99 rebate from manufactor?

I see it all the time from Walmart to Costco to Car lots. It is a fact of life in america, We want something for nothing.
 
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