stupid phone calls

Discussion in 'General Industry Discussions' started by LawnBrother, Apr 28, 2005.

  1. LawnBrother

    LawnBrother LawnSite Senior Member
    from SW Ohio
    Messages: 867

    Ok, this is the stupidist call I have gotten so far this year:

    Caller: "Hello, I got your number from a flyer. My name is Ms. Numbskull and I need some work done in my yard."
    Me: "Sure, I would be glad to. What exactly do you need done?"
    Caller: "Well, I'm not sure really. I think I just need my deck squared off, do you do that?"
    Me: ;) "Um, well, I have several ways to go about it. What size lawn mower do you think I should use on it?"
    Caller: "No, no, You don't understand, I don't need my grass cut. I need my deck squared off"
    Me: "Ok, then why didn't you call a carpenter??"
    Caller: "I just thought...oh never mind. Goodbye."
    Me: "GOODBYE."

    Man, what is the matter with some people??
    What are some of the stupidist calls you guys have had? I'm sure there are some better (worse) ones than this, although I'm still reeling from it....
  2. marko

    marko LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 963

    It seems most of the low price guys advertisements go like this:

    You determine your mowing price!!!
    Quality work, references, and Insured for your protection!
    Mowing, aeration/power raking, seeding, mulch, bush work
    snow removal, gutters cleaned, dog poop service, power washing
    windows cleaned, holiday lighting, dog walking, pet sitting, brickwork,
    patios, walkways, walls, garden soil turning, cleanups, cars washed
    oil changes, tree work, pools cleaned, fence repair, ponds, rock work
    stone work, lawn rolling, scalping, deck squaring, and deck installations. Call for a free estimate today!!!!!

    He probably thought since you mowed, you also did deck work.
  3. A+ Lawncare

    A+ Lawncare LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 503

    A proper LCO is not an jack arse of all trades, but rather a person who focuses in 1 thing to perfection.... we perfect ourselves on grass cutting and landscaping not carpentry. :cool2:
  4. pagefault

    pagefault LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 492

    Will work for food.

    At least these guys actually mean it when they say they will work...
  5. A+ Lawncare

    A+ Lawncare LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 503

    scrub alcoholic will work for beer :drinkup: whose worried about the green backs payup when all you use the money for beer...

    scrub prices, hehe :D

    .25 acre- 6pack of miller lite
    .50 acre- 12pack of miller lite
    .75 acre- 24pack of miller lite
    1 acre- 30pack of miller lite
  6. pagefault

    pagefault LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 492

    I'm serious. I don't know if you have actually seen some of these "scrubs". I could sell my two bicycles and buy a better setup than they have. I've known some really poor people in my day, so I have a pretty good idea of how these folks live. If you lived like that and you could barely keep food on the table, you'd do what you had to do too.

    When I was picking tobacco, I used to drive by this guy every day on my way to work. He had a sign that said "will work for food" or something along those lines. One day I stopped and offered him a job. $7.50 per hour to start, 10+ hours a day, with evenings and weekend hours available if he wanted to make even more. I was making more than $500 per week, which wasn't too bad for a college kid way back then. He said "No thanks".

    So, when I say "At least these guys actually mean it when they say they will work", I'm dead serious.
  7. A+ Lawncare

    A+ Lawncare LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 503

    thats stupid though, for the guy to turn u down if all he wants is food....for 10hr days w/$7.5 you can make $75 a day thats enough for 75 double cheese burgers off the $1 menu @ mc donalds, haha.... thats about $375 a week... and this guy turned you down b/c he wanted to be paid in double cheese burgers, should of just offered him 30 double cheese burgers a week, haha.... that would only cost ya $30 and total out to be around $40 w/tax..... thats about a $1 an hr if he worked 40hrs but you said 10hr days so if you worked 5days a weeks thats 50hrs so it comes out to be $0.80 cents an hr.... this guy sounded to be a real bread winner...haha

    better to bring home the green backs and go get the bacon @ foodlion then bring home the bacon from the jobsite :rolleyes:
  8. greywynd

    greywynd LawnSite Member
    Messages: 132

    One thing? is that grass cutting, OR landscaping....that's two things! How do you think the professional landscapers that don't want anything to do with regular mowing feel about you doing their work? To them most of you are scrubs/lowballers/whatever other name you have for them.
  9. marko

    marko LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 963

    EXACTLY! I know most states have requirements for major landscaping projects (either $ value or whatever). What I dont get is how do these low price, jack of all trades masters of none find the time do do all this crap???? I mow, fertilize, spray, and spread mulch. Pretty compact and specialized if you ask me. Any design work etc gets a referral.
  10. pagefault

    pagefault LawnSite Senior Member
    Messages: 492

    They make a lot more begging at a busy intersection. He didn't want food, he wanted money without work. That's why you shouldn't bash the guy with a 21" murray in the back of his K-car. At least he is working.

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